Quite some years ago I had a brief idea of starting a column teaching people how to learn a craft or hobby. It seemed a matter of self preservation for me at the time. I was the go-to person for people who get bored. Nothing to do? Dial Lou. Tired of rattling around? Call Mom. It's hard to know if they call me because they believe that I'm just rattling around also. For sure, they never seem to give a thought that I might have something they shouldn't interrupt going on at the other end of the line.
A recent AARP publication inspired these thoughts again. I couldn't believe the positions taken. There was dread of how long retirement would be. Others were urged to frenetically design their unstructured futures. All the advice (except to save, save, save, for your end years) seemed to take the joy right out of the prospect. Let me tell you -- structured or unstructured -- those years will just zip through your hands. And don't feel you're facing endless hours with nothing to do. I've many times threatened to go back to work so I can get some rest. Oh, she's not doing anything, she can run my errands. He's retired, so we can get him to volunteer at church . . . or school . . . or the hospital. People who hardly speak to you on a regular day have no reluctance to ask you to take care of their kid, for free if possible. Those lessons you had at fifty about it being okay to say no, will never be more helpful. The greatest puzzle to me is how many people, including almost strangers, have seen my education (B. S. in Journalism, M. A. in Educational Research and Psychology, All But Dissertation in School Psychology) as perfect training for cleaning their houses while they gallivant around being pretentious. I wonder why they think I did all that work being schooled when I could have cleaned houses if I had been a high school dropout.
Then there are the ones who resent you for knowing how to do something that they always wanted to know how to do. An acquaintance organized a dinner party to introduce me to two people involved in theater. Her stated reason was she wanted to see my book turned into a play so she could say she knew the author. Dinner had barely begun before she tells them that I've written a novel. "Oh, I've always wanted to do that exclaimed one of them." With that, he exhaled in a disappointed sigh and abruptly changed the subject. End of her fantasy.
Envying someone's golf skills or piano playing is common. It is also a waste of time. If there are things you have always wanted to know how to do, retirement is the time to do it. Buy a piano keyboard and learn to play by using self teaching books. Take bridge or poker lessons. Have a neighbor show you how to crochet. Her help plus self help books should do the trick. (Offer to pay her for her time). Take golf, tennis, swim lessons.
Go to hobby supply stores and inquire about their classes in knit or embroidery. Join a quilting guild that offers lessons for beginners. Check out how-to books from the library. Join a book discussion club. Buy an old wooden boat and rehab it. Learn to repair small appliances. Some construction supply stores offer how-to classes if you buy from them.
There is no reason why anyone should ever suffer from lack of activities. I've even known men who formed Liar's Clubs so they could meet for breakfast and play bragging games with others.
Retirement should be the "time of your life". So save, save, save now and enjoy it later. Hobbies can be expensive and it's a sure thing our Congress isn't planning to give up their retirement packages to save ours.
Then tell yourself that anyone of average to above average intelligence can do anything they want as long as they are willing to put forth the effort. It's true.
No comments:
Post a Comment