Oprah Winfrey once told a story about entering a store to shop and noticing signs that said "We reserve the right to refuse service to anyone." She was offended that, black belt shopper that she is, anybody would exhibit such signs in her presence.
About the same time, Wal-Mart was advertising the friendly greeting program that they had used for years. We would be welcomed by an old person each time we entered the store.
It occurred to me right then that the most welcome I had ever received from one of these kindred old people was when one of them shoved a shopping cart in my direction while he/she kept right on chatting with another clerk.
As is my usual trend, I began analyzing. I had retired by this time, so entertained the thought that they were offended by my pastel sweat suits. That couldn't be it. I had stopped at Wal-Mart stores numerous times on the way home from work. My customary "uniform" was dress slacks, fancy blouses, blazers, jewelry and dress shoes. Not the stuff of lower class people, enticing the contempt of the upper crust.
If I were African American, I might be prone to cry racism. But I am not. I'm the palest of blue-eyed whites with a mop of curly Irish-style hair.
One day I entered the nearest Wal-Mart to be greeted with a friendly smile and the promised welcome. I took time to thank her and tell her she was the first person I could recall actually greeting me. "Oh, I try to treat everyone alike," she said. Even that comment held a sting. Was she implying I was chump change who should be delivered a charitable greeting?
The lady was dressed to the nines. Her bleached blonde hair was a classy color and pulled up in a French roll, like those I had worn many times. She wore a dressy suit and heels, a great overkill for the job. Her companion, she could not have known, was quite familiar to me. He was a well known wealthy businessman for whom I had actually worked. What they were doing slumming that day, I have no idea.
My point with this narrative is that I shall never know in this life why these greeters consistently ignored my entrance into the store when their paychecks were contingent on making customers feel welcome. As I said, if I were African American, I would probably assume racism, which was not a correct analysis in my case. But it is the knee-jerk response with which the people of color in our country do view interactions with everyone.
I don't know how Oprah dresses for shopping or whether she entered that posh store with a smile on her face. If she looked and behaved as she did on her daily show, I'm sure nobody would have resented her presence. But, what if she entered with four or five friends, dressed down, and acting like Sophie in The Color Purple? That would be a frightening scene to see.
We need to ask "What else can it be?" before we make assumptions. In the case of the Wal-Mart greeters, were they bored? Did their feet hurt? Were they too old to stand all day?
There could be a number of causes for each situation we face. Maybe we could adopt an "it is what it is" attitude and not analyze and blame everything to death. It's open to interpretation.
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